2012 Parenting

I like my job.  I really do.  And it is definitely getting easier as the girls grow, particularly Sasha.  So I was trying to reflect on exactly how things are 'easier' than they were a few months ago or how my day-to-day life looks, and I came up with a few observations:

• I'm an Iron Chef:  I really think that those cooking shows where they compete to see who can come up with a full meal with only certain ingredients have nothing on most parents of small children.  And those supposed chefs don't even have a Lego sculpture falling onto the stove, an obstacle course of kitchen utensils spewed across the floor by a tiny person who is whining and pulling on their legs, and a slightly bigger person who is already complaining about what is being prepared in those dangerously hot pots of steaming and sizzling food!  Hmmm, maybe I just came up with a good idea for a new reality TV show....or maybe it's just my reality on a nightly basis. 

• What is the Point?  It seems we are on the go a lot, trying to fit in grocery shopping, swimming lessons, preschool pick-up, etc. etc.  Sasha is pretty good at rolling with it, since I often have to wake her up from naps and shove food in her face so we will be on time to where we need to go.  But every time I open the car to put someone in or get someone out, I keep thinking, "It's happened.  I have a 'mom' backseat." It honestly looks like a loaf of bread exploded in there, and was stomped on every day for the past week.  But, then I tell myself, 'what is the point of cleaning?' because another loaf of bread (or some other food item) will be erupting there very very soon. 

My shame:  It actually looks cleaner in the photo.

A well-loved (and well-taped up) book

• Deja Vu: I'm having serious deja vu now that Morgan is reading all the Richard Scarry books she can get her hands on, as well as watching the TV shows.  My mom recently gave us my old copy of "What Do People Do All Day?", which I LOVED as a child, and Morgan has been requesting we read it to her all the time.  She can read quite a bit of it and knows all the characters names, which are now becoming starring roles in her imaginary play throughout the day.  It brings back great memories and is such a great learning tool.  And the bonus is that it really covers a lot of the economics, engineering, finance, civics, and marketing that I seemed to miss when I was in school.  :)

• "Wait For It" Parenting:  This is a new technique I have picked up in recent months, and I think the title is pretty fitting.  I'm sure most parents of older kids have become experts at this, as were my own parents back in the day.  It's pretty simple.  You go about trying to do a million things that need to be done and pick up the toys that you are tripping over and maybe fit in a trip to the bathroom if possible.  Then, when you hear some kind of loud or unusual sound coming from the next room, you pause for a moment, listen carefully, and wait for the..... scream, cry, complaint, counterpunch, etc.  You get the idea.  If there is silence or kids happily playing, I carry on with my slave duties (or Facebook status update).  If not, I go in and see who needs an ice pack or a kiss or a time out.  Yes, some may question my lack of supervision, but I am willing to bet that most parents out there rely on this technique.  (I know my mother, mother-in-law and grandmother-in-law are cringing right now, thinking about poor Sasha getting beat up on, but I think that it seems to be pretty equal between the two girls!)

Snacking...

Sharing...

Snuggling!

• Nothing Like Sisters:  I grew up with two older sisters and am so lucky today (didn't think I was all that lucky when I was little though) to have a great relationship with them both.  I am watching the love and relationship between Morgan and Sasha grow, as Sasha gives back more and becomes her own little person.  Of course I also worry that I'm starting to screw them up by the aforementioned parenting technique, like letting Sasha get picked on or letting Morgan dominate and rule over her.  I was the littlest sister and, while lots of people (mainly my sisters) like to point out how easy it was for me to be the 'baby,' I also had to put up with a lot of crap that I don't want Sasha to have to deal with.  But, it is part of growing up and she will have to learn to fight her own battles, which believe me, she does.  Morgan does have such an incredible personality that she truly wants everyone around her to be happy, so she is being a pretty good role model and friend to Sasha.  

• Bye Bye Baby:  Sasha is nearly a year and a half, and has changed into a toddler at warp speed, thanks to being kid #2.  It is pretty cool, but I also find myself coming to terms with my baby not being a baby anymore.  When you spend decades, probably, imagining what it will be like to have a baby, and now they are here and that pregnancy/birth/baby phase is over, it's kind of odd. Liberating and a relief, yes, but strange and sad too. 

• Yell Less, Smile More!  I think most moms of my generation seem to always be trying to do the best thing for their kids in this age of information overload.  There is enough to worry about and stay updated on and to analyze and compare yourself to what you assume all other mothers are doing except you, so you are therefore failing.  I had one of those Oprah "aha" moments the other day when I was feeling guilty about one thing or another.  And I just realized that what I really need to do is focus on staying true to who I want to be as a mom, and what I feel is important, not about what some article or blogger or new study says.  That doesn't seem like much, but it took the weight off my shoulders and let me accept that I am doing pretty well at this job.  And if I can remember these two things, I will be even better: yell less and smile more!