Mysteries Revealed

One of the best parts about being a human being is that life is full of surprises.  Back in the beginning of 2014, when I was trying to make sense of my life and figure out where things were headed, I honestly didn't know what the year would bring.  All I knew was that I was trying (really hard at times) to just be open and excited for what the future could bring.  And now, I really could never have predicted the most recent turn of events.  In just the past few weeks, I interviewed, accepted, and started a new teaching job!

I think a lot shifted this spring when we went on our trip to Europe.  I had focused a lot of time and energy preparing and planning for that trip, and once it was over, I think deep down I was looking for the next challenge.   When I came home, I looked at teaching job openings online… just for the heck of it.  There happened to be a position that was kind of my ideal:  half-time ESL teacher at a school with a Spanish immersion program, within a 20 minute drive from my house.  Hmmm, I thought.  A week or so later, I felt brave enough to update my resume and application and send it in.  It was an impulsive move, but it was good for me to just to have gone through the process, I told myself.  

A few weeks went by and I hadn’t heard anything.  I was secretly kind of happy since I really didn’t know what I would do if they called me back, and I honestly didn’t even think I was ready to go back to work at all.  After three weeks I got a message inviting me in for an interview.  I kind of didn’t want to return the call to schedule the interview.  I didn’t want to have to think about how life would change if I went back to work, even just part time.  I felt a huge wave of guilt when I started thinking of putting my desire to get back to teaching ahead of Sam and the kids.  That was silly because Sam, of course, was very supportive and encouraging.  But honestly, I was scared of the change and all the unknowns.  

But once I did go to the interview, I was feeling excited to get back to something I was good at, my old identity, something that would help me (hopefully) find a better balance in the current place I am at in motherhood.  I knew there was a reason I applied in the first place.  And I also knew that there would never be a perfect time for me to go back to work.  Just like there’s never a perfect time to have a kid or buy a house or any huge life decision.  But sometimes, you take the leap and figure the rest out as you go.  It makes life more interesting.

But it has been a roller coaster of emotions.  I accepted a job that I thought wanted even though I wasn't even sure.  I decided to go back to work because I was the one who wanted it, not because my husband or kids needed me to.  I took a job that I didn't know the hours or the grade level or many of the exact details of the job.  And I accepted this job not knowing what the heck I was going to do for child care with Sasha.  And the job started in 10 days!  So it was a major leap of faith, one that this overly-planning person isn't always comfortable with.  Yet somehow, I knew it would all work out one way or another.  Build it and they will come, kind of thing, right?

And somehow it has worked out beautifully.  My husband has been incredibly supportive, my kids seem to be ok with it (or at least aren't throwing major fits), a local preschool happened to have an opening perfect for Sasha and for my schedule....and away we go!  Mrs. Holloway is back at work! So far, I have been to a lot of trainings and meetings, and am just getting to know the school and staff where I will be working.   But it's FUN!  Fun to be around adults, fun to do a job where I know what I'm doing (unlike much of motherhood!), and fun to feel passionate about work again. Work isn't much of a mystery to most people, but it took me a little while to figure this out for myself.  

Our Last Few Days in London: June 10-13

Double decker view

In our last few days in London we tried to tick off a few more things that were on our list....and keep the kids happy!  While Sam was finishing up his final day with his students, Natalie and I decided to really make Sasha and Morgan's day:  a double decker bus ride, a visit to Britain's largest toy store, and lunch at McDonald's.  Are these lucky kids, or what?

We were really getting the hang of riding the double decker buses, which were such a fun way to see the city.  Buses came by all the time - there are millions of them - and they have their own lane which helps them get around London's terrible traffic.  Nat, the girls, and I headed down to busy Picadilly Circus on our way to Hamley's Toy Store, which is the oldest - as in 240 years old - and largest toy store in the world (according to wikipedia).  Since 1881, it has been located on Regent's Street, a posh shopping area in central London. We found it pretty easily and entering the store was like entering Willy Wonka's factory - pure kid-centered joy.

BIG SMILES!

The place has seven floors and I seriously underestimated the amount of time one could spend there.  Not only were there toys of all kinds everywhere, they had employees everywhere too, demonstrating toys, cracking jokes, and keeping us entertained.  It was a perfect diversion for us and the girls. Morgan's eyes lit up and Sashs'a giggles were off the charts.   They got to play with giant frisbees, have a remote control helicopter land on their hand, and make remote control break-dancing cars spin around.  One of the most impressive things were the lifesize Lego sculptures of the Royal family!  Queen Elizabeth, Prince Charles, Harry, William, and even Princess Kate in her wedding dress.  As my British friends used to say, "OTT!" (over the top).  I let the girls pick out a fairly lame (i.e, cheap and easy to pack) coloring/craft project, and was proud I strategically avoided the entire floor with baby dolls.  We could have stayed all day, but the kids were getting hungry and we still had to locate McDonald's.  That proved to be MUCH harder than we thought.  I honestly couldn't believe we spent at least a half an hour in London searching for that greasy American icon, but Aunt Nat pulled through and found it in the nick of time.  A major accomplishment!

Hamley's on Regent Street

Queen Elizabeth II in LEGOS!

Sasha and Paddington as a Royal Guard

Fun playing with remote control breakdancing cars

Once Sam was done teaching, we were able to enjoy more of downtown London.  We started the day in Trafalgar Square with some daredevil sculpture climbing by the girls, a picnic lunch, and Morgan's front tooth finally falling out!  Quite a memory for her baby book!  Then we walked through Covent Garden where Morgan enjoyed seeing some live performance art: a funny man with a comedy routine and two story-high unicycle.  She thought it was great fun, and I hoped she didn't catch any of the swear words or adult humor.  From there it was time for "The Lion King."  It happened to be the same show Sam and I saw on my birthday trip nine years ago, and this matinee was full of many kids on school trips in their adorable uniforms.  Unfortunately, it made the line for the loos very long, but the girls felt right at home with all the kids.

Meeting the famous lions of Trafalgar Square

What a place to lose a tooth!

They look so sweet....but they are spirited too!

Morgan loving the show at Covent Garden 

LION KING!  Sasha is SO excited!

Big Ben!!

And for our final full day in London, we did the ultimate tourist attraction:  The London Eye!  We had a beautiful sunny day and heard Big Ben bonging the hour right as we stepped out of the tube station.  We then walked across the gorgeous Westminster Bridge on our way to the London Eye, which has become one of those iconic images in London in recent years.  And the bigger the tourist attraction, of course the more the girls want to go.  The 30 minute ride was nice, considering the very steep price, and we got amazing views of the city.  I was actually a bit underwhelmed, but it probably had more to do with being trapped in a glass capsule with my whiney, unimpressed kids and 15 strangers than the actual ride itself!  The girls did love the Jubilee playground right below the London Eye a bit better, but they often say that the London Eye was one of their favorite things there.  If only they knew how lucky they are.

The view stepping out of the Westminster tube station

Quite a view!

They would have been happy with a 10 minute ride

Our shadow on the Thames

Little eyes on a big world

Making memories

Pretty cool playground!

Ice cream stroll back home

Our last night in London ended with a sisters night out!  Sam watched the girls while Nat and I got to go out together- something we rarely get to do at home.  We enjoyed a long and fabulous dinner back at Pulpo - the amazing little Italian place in our neighborhood that we loved.  The cocktails and flank steak were amazing!  Best of all was lots of uninterrupted time to chat with my big sister and remember all the fun times from the past two weeks.  I'm so happy Natalie was with us on the London part of our European Adventure.  Not only was she a big help to Sam and I, but she was so much fun!  I know she had a great time exploring London and her enthusiasm for all things Charles Dickens and merry old England was contagious.  Ending the trip with a fun night out in London with my sis was the perfect finale to an incredible two weeks!

My wonderful dinner date!

Gorgeous full moon on a hot summer night!

Global Growing Pains

Note:   I actually wrote this post while we were still in London.

When Sam and I taught in Prague, we were lucky to work with amazing students who were literally students of the world.  Most had lived in several different countries with their expat parents, spoke two, three or four languages fluently, and were so curious and accepting of everyone's differences.  They were very privileged kids, but also very level-headed and humble.  I dreamed that someday my own children could be exposed to these kind of kids and the experiences of an international school.

Another end to a London excursion

So here we are.  Day 10 of our London and European Adventure is finally happening!  We are spending an entire month abroad, exposing our girls to amazing sights, new cultures, different foods, and trying to open their eyes to all the world has to offer.  And. They. Just. Want. To. Go. Home!  They tell us nearly every day of our trip, particularly at bedtime and especially when they are feeling emotional and tired.  And it's really hard to hear.  You want your kids to be happy and you do your best to prepare them, but times like this make me feel like this was not the best decision for our girls at this point in their lives.

Sasha has had an incredibly hard time going to sleep.  Rather, WE have had an incredibly hard time getting her to bed every night.  It takes about 2-4 hours, and involves a fair bit of yelling, hitting (by her), crying (both of us), and back and forth in and out of the room.  It makes it so hard for the girls to share a bedroom, and leaves us feeling completely defeated and exhausted by the end of the night.  And of course there is a lot of "I want to go home!" and "I want to leave this city!" from Sasha during all of this.  It actually has crossed our minds to go home early, and that perhaps we have taken on too much too soon with our little travelers.  I knew this trip would be most challenging for Sasha, but I never expected it to be this hard.

A break from the tantrums - coloring at 2 am

Part of this with Sasha is that she is three.  Three year olds like routine and more routine and then like to feel like they are in charge of everything.  Essentially, those things are now impossible since we are in a new place and every day we do something different.  But I think it's even starting to get to Morgan.  I know how desperately she misses her friends and craves playing with other children.  Being away from so many familiar things has been extremely hard for them.

Sam and I both admitted to each other that we have had the thought cross our minds to pack it up early and head home.  A dream trip to Europe is now turning into a fun but exhausting and overwhelming quest.

But in the last day or so here in London, something has shifted.  Sasha's giggle has returned and she is starting to get her sparkle back! We are at a transition point, and Sam and I have both felt the tide is turning with our kids - for the better.  Sasha is finally catching up on her sleep and giving in more to the lack of structure in our "new" life, instead of fighting it.  She is back to her cheerful self, cracking silly jokes (with her own version of the rhyme: "I see Paris, I see London, I see Mommy's underwear!")  This is such a relief for us, and makes us feel a bit better about dragging her across the globe.

A nap, the iPad, and beer help keep the Holloways happy!

We now know we can continue with this amazing journey, but we also have to remind ourselves that all of these experiences don't come without a price.  Those international students we used to teach had to go through a lot of change and challenge to get to be those thoughtful, global kids we admired.  And if we want our kids - and ourselves - to truly grow and learn from this experience, we have to be ready for the rough patches and growing pains that come along with traveling the world.

 Morgan had her own issues with culture shock and adjustment later on in the trip, but I will get to that when I write about our time in France.  Stay tuned... and thanks for reading!

Asleep at the dinner table!

Living Local in London

Enjoying a beer and an Instagramed view from our flat

From our past experiences, Sam and I have learned the unique differences between traveling abroad and living abroad, and know the richness the latter can bring.  So part of the appeal of this whole adventure in the first place was the opportunity to stay in London for an extended period of time. We both thought 'it will be so cool to all live in London for 6 weeks!'  But as the trip approached we realized with Morgan in school and a limited budget in an expensive city, it wasn't going to be possible. Regardless, our two weeks in London were pretty amazing, and it didn't take long for us to start to feel a bit like locals.

Farringdon Road by night

We were able to get an updated flat on Farringdon Road, in the same building where Sam's students and his professor colleague were staying.  The three-bedroom apartment was modern and had a lot of nice features, including an incredible view down Farringdon Road to St. Paul's Cathedral and the modern "Shard" building.  I never got tired of that view and looking over the old rooftops across the city!  However, there were a few things that got old pretty fast.  The beds in the flat were terribly uncomfortable, many of the appliances were broken, and we had to be careful not to leave food around because there were mice (and traps set)!  And Farringdon Road is a very busy thoroughfare with cars, buses, trucks, and motorcycles roaring up loudly it day and night.  BUT... I really shouldn't complain because we were getting to live in London after all!!!  They say sleep is overrated ('they' are wrong), and we never did see any mice, so despite an achey back, life was great!

The living room of our flat

Nat and Sasha being silly on a rainy day

Sunset over the rooftops

A late night visit by the fire brigade!

But we found out that living with college students can have its drawbacks...like fire drills.  When the fire alarm went off on our second night in London we figured it was some college kid trying to cook badly, but when we smelled something burning we decided we really needed to evacuate.  This would not have been that big of a deal, except both girls had miraculously fallen asleep at 6pm that night (thanks to jet lag) and the alarm went off at 9pm!  After waking the girls up and hanging out with everyone on the sidewalk while the fire brigade came and checked out the building (it turned out to be an electrical malfunction with the alarm - grrr), we all headed back to bed.  However, Miss Sasha didn't end up falling asleep until 4AM that night!!!  All part of the "adventure," right?

Fun times on the tube!

Walking back from the tube

We were staying in The City, the oldest part of London which first came about when the Romans established it a couple thousand years ago.  Clearly it's seen a LOT of history. Today, The City is the main financial and legal district and is full of busy people bustling to work each morning, popping out for a quick bite of lunch from a nearby take away place (Pret a Manger was one of our favorites), and then stopping by the corner pub at 5:00 sharp for a pint on the way home.  We didn't see may kids living in this part of town so we felt like oddballs at times with ours in tow as we joined the masses streaming to and from the tube station.  There really were no tourists in this part of town, which we liked and made us feel even more like temporary locals.  Yet for being the financial center of town, it wasn't as intense as you might think.  The uniform of most people seemed to be black, and more black.  Not only were people not too fancy and formal, but we found nearly everyone we interacted with to be so friendly and nice.  I wasn't expecting people in a huge city like London to be so friendly and laid back, so it was a nice surprise.  Strangers would come up and ask us if we needed directions, and everyone in general seemed pretty easy going - not all that different than Portland.

A park is full on a sunny lunch hour

The corner pub overflows with young Londoners after work

Another advantage of Sam being in London before us was that he discovered cheap places to eat, cool old pubs, and parks!  There was a sweet little park a five-minute walk from our flat, which made our stay in London so much nicer with the kids.  Spa Fields Park had a fun playground as well as a nice grassy park with paths and a rose garden.  We went there many times and always encountered friendly parents with their kids.  Plus the playground had climbing structures and a funky teeter-totter that were quite different than the kinds we see here in the States.

Super climber!

Morgan and another girl on the bouncy teeter-totter

My pigeon chaser!

Part of the fun of living somewhere new for a while is discovering all the little details of day to day life. The girls loved watching cartoons on the BBC kids channel - some of which were the same shows that we have here but with English accents!  They picked up new words from TV and hearing people around them, and started using them.  Some of their favorite words were: lift, tube, biscuits, ice lolly, and loo.  Morgan would practice her English accent and got pretty good at it, and I was pretty sure by the end of our time in London Sasha was calling me "Mummy" instead of her usual "Mommy."  Riding the tube, we encountered lots of fun names of places that we would say in our silly accents.  Cockfoster was one of my favorites, and it could even be used as a swear word on occasion!

Traditional cask beers in a modern pub

A summer night at our local pub: The Crown Tavern

Black Friar Pub stained glass

My refection with St. Paul's on a rainy orb 

I was even able to fit in a run during morning rush hour one morning.  I can't say it made me feel like a local, but it certainly gave me a feel of the number of people commuting to work in The City everyday. It felt as though I was in a race, but everyone was going a different direction and with a different finish line.  Running against the stream of walkers was intense, but getting to run along the Thames River past the London Eye and Big Ben on a beautiful morning was something I will never forget.  

Hello Big Ben!  Running in London is intense! 

And we were so lucky that Sam's awesome students practically begged us to let them babysit the girls a couple nights.  Well, sure!  One night the three of us grown-ups got to visit one very old pub and one new craft beer pub, as well as have an amazing dinner out.  On another night, Sam and I had a lovely date night (the first in many months!) at a little wine bar we discovered on Cowcross Road.  I guess it did start to feel like we were locals after all. 

Date night in The City!