A Glamorous Life

Thinking back over the first year of Sasha's life, there were so many moments when I secretly wished I could have some time to myself.  I dreamed about simply being alone, without anyone needing me for what felt like every minute of the day.  And when I wasn't in demand, I was so sleep-deprived that all I could think about was ONE sweet, blissful night of sleep!  I fantasized about a hotel room where I could lock myself in and just sleep with no interruptions.  I just wanted a "do not disturb" sign for my life.  

Well, apparently I wasn't so secret about those fantasies, because Sam heard me loud and clear.  For Christmas, he surprised me with a "free pass" to 24 hours free of parenting duties and a night alone at The Nines Hotel!  I was very shocked to get such an extravagant gift (this is the nicest hotel in Portland), and of course immediately felt guilty that I didn't deserve it, especially to go away without him.  But Sam was insistent that it was only for me.  I told him it felt like I would be sort of like cheating on him with myself.  ;)  But then when I thought about all the times I put our family first so many times before myself, I realized that I was worth it and I did deserve something this indulgent.  It had been a challenging year.

But before the hotel was even booked, one of the best parts of the gift was simply imagining it before it actually happened.  For a month or so, I pictured that quiet room, clean white sheets, and room service.  It helped me get through many long days.  I was trying to savor the anticipation of it as much as possible.  But I not only wanted to make up for all the lost sleep of the past year (although that would have been impossible), I wanted to make up for other things that I had missed as well... like shopping for something other than groceries...and a night out with girlfriends.

It has been a couple of busy weeks since I got to take advantage of my night away, and it all ended up working out perfectly.  I was able to get my room right when Sam and the girls dropped me off ("noon to noon" was our arrangement).  And the room was amazing.  I was so giddy with excitement at this stylish room to myself - especially since someone else had cleaned it up for me! - that I wasn't sure what to do with myself: take a nap? stare out the window from the 12th floor? take as long a shower as I wanted? jump on the bed?  Sooooo many choices!

HEAVEN!!!

And I was right in downtown Portland.... even more choices.  I ended up grabbing lunch by myself and brought a book along I'd been wanting to read.  Then I got to do some leisurely shopping that I never seem to have time or patience to do, and then it was time to go back and enjoy my room.  The floor I was on had complementary drinks and snacks, so I had to make sure I took advantage of that.  I had my own happy hour, consisting of a long shower, watching some HGTV, taking my time to get ready for the evening, and champagne!

Downtown reflection in a hallway mirror

Even though I don't get the opportunity as often as I would like to, I planned a girls night that evening.  Erica, Kim, and my friends, Amy, Lisa and Sarah joined in. We enjoyed a few drinks in my room and then had a yummy dinner at a French restaurant nearby.  Best of all were the laughs, stories, and fun I got to have with these wonderful women whom I am lucky to have in my life.  I wished my other close girlfriends could have joined in, but they are in different cities, states or countries right now!

The following morning I tried to sleep in, but with mommy brain and years of early rising that wasn't quite possible.  But not having to leap out of bed to cater to someone else was just as nice.  :)  Instead, I had breakfast in bed with... George Clooney!  Well, that would be room service and the movie "The Descendents," which I had been wanting to see for a long time. 

Simply having 24 hours away doesn't make all the sleepless nights, stress, aching back, and frustrating moments simply vanish, but it does remind me of some important things.  First, just having dedicated time to myself is really sacred.  It could be going away for a night or simply fitting in a run or a haircut, but it's "me time" and I should not feel guilty about it.  Secondly, it's good to miss your life - I was so excited to see the girls and Sam when they picked me up the next day and hear them say "Mommy" and "Mama."  And finally, I have an incredible, incredible husband whom I love more every day.  He makes me a better mother and a better person - still not quite sure how I got so lucky.  :)  But next time I go away, I am taking him with me!

Cheers to me!